This Dead Mom Day, I took a red-eye from a boozy, sunny lazy weekend in Oahu with Mele and my step-sisters (Their mom is still alive). Mele probably spent today working on her thesis paper thingy. Our mom's so dead, Mele's going to have a Masters! Wooo! Also in honor of Dead Mom Day, I'll be flying to Paris tomorrow to shoot the 2010 von Hottie calendar. We don't know if our dead mom would approve of her eldest daughter gallivanting around the world in her bathing suit, but I guess I'll do it anyway, because she's dead and she can't stop me!
Happy Dead Mom Day!
Monday, August 31, 2009
Saturday, May 30, 2009
If our dead mom were a ballerina, this is what she would look like.
.jpg)
Just kidding. That's me in a play.
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Happy Birthday to our dead mom!
Today is our dead mom's birthday! Just because she's dead, doesn't mean she can't have a party! I bet our dead grandma is pouring her a big glass of bubbly just about now. Aren't they so cute together at their cocktail party in heaven?
Our dead mom's birthday is just one day before mine, so we used to celebrate together. And by together, I mean our dead mom would throw me a big a party and make me a big cake and the whole birthday was all about me. Me, me, me, me, me! Our dead mom taught me a lot of things, but that lesson I really took to heart. Our dead mom's birthday is all about me!
So, in honor of our dead mom's birthday, I'm going to do something really, really nice. . . .for myself.
Love you, dead mom!
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Sarah Palin Baby Name Generator
Sarah Palin is not our mom, but if she were:
1) She'd be dead
2) My name would be Froth Moonshine Palin and Mele's name would be Fire Patriot Palin.
Check out the Sarah Palin Baby Name Generator to see what your name would have been.
1) She'd be dead
2) My name would be Froth Moonshine Palin and Mele's name would be Fire Patriot Palin.
Check out the Sarah Palin Baby Name Generator to see what your name would have been.
Sunday, August 31, 2008
Happy Dead Mom Day # 17
What we're doing this Happy Dead Mom Day:
Mele is hiking up and down each mountain of the Big Island with my dad, our dead mom's ex-husband. I am going to a barbecue where I will consume plenty of ribs, in honor of my dead mom, who can't eat ribs anymore because she's dead.
In other news, my breast sonogram came back clear. So far, my breasts won't make me dead like our dead mom. When people say, "Wow Laura, your rack is a killer," I say, "You're telling me!"
HAHAHAHAHAHA. Ok, you probably don't think it's funny, but if you had a dead mom, it would be funny to you too.
Mele is hiking up and down each mountain of the Big Island with my dad, our dead mom's ex-husband. I am going to a barbecue where I will consume plenty of ribs, in honor of my dead mom, who can't eat ribs anymore because she's dead.
In other news, my breast sonogram came back clear. So far, my breasts won't make me dead like our dead mom. When people say, "Wow Laura, your rack is a killer," I say, "You're telling me!"
HAHAHAHAHAHA. Ok, you probably don't think it's funny, but if you had a dead mom, it would be funny to you too.
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Things We'll Never Get To Do With Our Dead Mom
1) Submit to Postcards from Yo Momma.
2) Everything else.
2) Everything else.
Thursday, October 11, 2007
our dead mom is way dead #1
Our dead mom is way dead. Our dead mom is so dead Mele's finally getting paid! This means our mom had been dead so long, her trust is closing. Which means not only do we no longer have a mom, we no longer have a dead mom's estate. God! Do they have to take everything?!
On the upside, we now have mad amounts of jewelry we can store in all the storage units we've had to rent since our mom died. We may not have a mom, but we've got mad stuff.
On the upside, we now have mad amounts of jewelry we can store in all the storage units we've had to rent since our mom died. We may not have a mom, but we've got mad stuff.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)